If Footmen Tire You, What Will Horses Do?

Based on the psychobabble of Reverend Estus W. Pirkle; what would happen to America if its citizens do not give up their depraved ways and turn to the light for salvation? Communist infiltrators, the 'footmen', will pave the way for an all-out invasion by weakening our will through television, dance, rock music, and alcohol. Once the invasion begins, the new Communist government will round up all Christians, and either execute them or force them to undergo reeducation. Only by putting their faith in the Bible where it belongs, says Pirkle, can America resist the coming Red Menace.